I like hugs.

If you are blessed, you have someone in your life who is a real “hugger,” and that can be around a tree too – even though the best ones are warm and up close. I have known several people in my life who knew how to hug, and was it great! They put all their love, warmth and acceptance into one great squeeze, which left you feeling as invigorated as a good nap. Amazing what recharging the body and soul can accomplish.

I realize that many of us are not “in relationships” due to divorce, death or just not yet finding the right person, but that doesn’t mean we need to be left out.  Don’t get me wrong here, intimacy with the right person can be insane, and give you an outlook on life that rivals any reality show, or perky little bird singing at the top of his lungs on a summer day.  However, just true unconditional acceptance from another person, in the form of a hug is a gift in itself, and can come from anywhere at any time and make all the difference.

As a mother and grandmother, I do find such little golden nuggets around the corner now and then with a giggle, or as an unexpected ninja attack, and they are wonderful.  Sometimes catching that same look in a photo is almost as good, holding the hug forever –  a type of break in case of emotional emergency. Looking at such photos over the years, and remembering the laughter and spontaneity, as well as the love behind them is this type of treasure.  It reminds us where we have gone, what we have accomplished, loved and most of all what we hold in our heart. Thank you Mr. Eastman, wherever your spirit may be,  for perfecting what we take for granted in facebook to notebook to upload.

As each day passes and things change, and “improve” albeit not always in the right direction, I have seen not just a “lack” of hugging and/or emotional expressions of acceptance, but also the significance of them even when photographed. We are evolving into such a single minded, selfish and withdrawn society, that has no need to be with  another.  All we need anymore is  just a computer or phone screen to make contact, and as we lose time and age,  evolving into  a form of morlock or eloi i.e. a machine driven emotional imbalance that will eventually grind to a halt, leaving us with blank stares on un-photographed faces.

Probably a good third of all recent photos I have from family and friends are taken with a digital camera or cell phone. Too many of them however, are taken as they hold out an arm,  lengths away from themselves, smiling (usually in the bathroom? I have no clue on this aspect, God help me) or quickly positioned into a group, with an intense close up cheek-to-cheek (party on Garth!). As I look at these photos I usually chuckle, enjoying the spontaneous moment, but I am also sad at what is missing and lost. The personal eye contact, looking into the lens, saying without a word emotional feelings and sincere love, which later becomes a quiet hug, when the person is gone.

When do we get off the Jetson treadmill, bring Astro inside, get the appropriate unconditional lick on the face while scratching his tummy, and then hug each other? We move so fast through the day anymore that taking a picture is just a quick outstretched arm in front of the shower, and a goofy smile and I for one do not want it to develop any further, if I can help it!  Likewise, the emoticon 🙂 affection we offer to each other in lieu of holding hands, hugging or a peck on the cheek is no better.

Today, shower the people you love with true emotion, pose for a picture, take a candid moment and laugh over it, and then when it is all said and done, hug one another as if it really matters – because trust me it does!